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power

THE DOUBLE ENGINE™

Twice the promises. One power button.

4.4/5₹5,555 (second engine sold separately, oddly)

Reviewed by The Perpetually Outraged Nationalist

Performance
85%
Durability
70%
Ideological Consistency
60%
Noise Level
80%
Ease of Operation
65%
Political Compatibility
82%
Family Approval
45%
Likelihood of Changing Sides
30%
Aftercare

Immediately followed by an inauguration ceremony.

The Full Review

This product promised twice the power and, I am pleased to report, delivered exactly one power button, which is honestly more than most manage. The inauguration alone was moving. Durability is respectable, though the second engine has, as of this writing, not been located. Overall: a triumph of branding over engineering, and I would not have it any other way. Would use again at the next ribbon-cutting.

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